hurting hearts

a week a go my cousin's little boy, who is almost 2, was sent to primary children's where they discovered he has a brain tumor.  he had surgery the next morning to put a shunt in his head and a port in so that they could start chemo.   i spoke to my aunt, who had driven up from las vegas to be with her grandson, the day he was admitted and told her that we would come to the hospital that night and bring dinner to everyone. i asked her what little jake was into these days so we could go get him something.  she said "shrek and horses" which i repeated out loud. the next thing i knew, there was a pile of toys at my feet.  my precious, little madden had gone upstairs and gathered up all of his shrek toys, anything that even resembled a horse {bullseye & the avatar horses} and more to give to little jake.   the boy has such a tender heart under his tough, little exterior.  he asks about jake everyday.  we love you, jake!! can't wait till you feel better.

one of my dearest friends, deAnn {who all my sisters thank me for bringing into our lives on almost a daily basis. she really is that special.},  lost her dad suddenly monday night.  although i had only met him a handful of times, i adored him and his protectiveness of his family. {"you go tell that lady in the office...." it still cracks me up.=)} and i felt as though i knew him well from all of deAnn's stories.  he was a detective for the salt lake county sherrif's department and had the funniest, scariest, and strangest stories i have ever heard and i was always so excited to hear more. {i shall look for you on the other side, garth..;)}  he will be greatly missed on this earth by many, many people.

i love you, dee more than i could ever say {you know i'm not good at words and such.;)} and i am constantly amazed by your strength {seriously, 4 kids!=)} and ability to always find the good in all. 

...i'm here.

silver lining {there is always one}:  these types of things will always put your life into perspective if for even just a small moment.  and sometimes just a small moment is all you need to change your way of thinking. one second i am dreaming of summer dresses and vacation plans and the next i could care less about any of that and the only thing i long for is home and family.